Not Good Enough

I wanna cry, I wanna scream
  but what will they say? “Oh you are being extreme!”
I wanna lay in bed all day
  and not care about what anyone will say
I wanna be able to look at you and not feel sad
  cause im getting tired of being jealous and mad
I wanna be able to look at you and not feel a thing
  but instead I look at you and feel a hurricane
I wanna talk with you day and night
  but I know you wouldn’t give a shit if i didn't reply
Maybe im going crazy, maybe im going insane
  but when I was with you, I felt sane
When you came over, we talked all night
  and for the first time in a while, it felt right…

In that same night, after we got bored of talking
  what happened next, was really shocking
After a while of talking stupid shit
  you grabbed me by my chin and that’s when we kissed
I don’t know if it was just me
  but it made me feel as if it was a dream
But with every dream, not far behind comes the nightmare
 so please take a seat and read in dispair

We did something that I do not regret
  but get your mind out of the gutter…we didn’t have sex
After what happened you gave me a goodnight kiss
  I thought I was in heaven cause it felt like pure bliss
The next day I woke up so excited
  but what happened next left me blindsided
You ignored me all day, no flirting, no wink, no smile
  it made me angry and hate you for a while

Time flew by and it was already six
  that was the time you were supposed to leave and that's when i started to feel sick
We said our goodbyes and you gave me a kiss
  i smiled but i didn't have in mind what i was gonna miss
I took the chance and told you i liked you
  what you said next made my heart break in two
You told me you didn't know how you felt about me
  and to be honest it felt like i was dying...

I went inside and crashed on my bed
  the only thing i wished was that i was dead
its 3:00 AM right now and im still crying
  for a boy that kissed me and was probably lying
I know that i will never be good enough for you
  but i just hope you find someone that loves you like i do...  
  

  

Tags: sad, rhyme, depressing, confused, pain,