Chips and Fishes

This is I suppose mainly a song, but as ever with comic offerings, it works just as well as a poem. Now, I should acknowledge where I got the inspiration from; it is the well known folk singer / writer / musician Alan Bell, or at least his own original words. He wrote a folk hymn called Bread and Fishes. This is a rather irreverend parody, and instead of the Holy Family coming to Britain, which the original song is about, this concerns three young chaps already here, and who liked beer - a lot - followed by the (de rigeur) supper from the nearest chippy.

As I went a-drinkin’ one night on the ale,
I met with three boozers who were all drinkin’ pale.
One was a fat man, the second his mate,
The third was a young lad who drank by the crate. . . .

. . . .and they sang. . . . 

“We got wind in the mornin’, and a whackin’ great head, 
And we heaved down the toilet and went back to bed. . . .
For we had chips and fishes, after ten pints of beer,
And it dulls all your senses and your belly feels queer.”

So I sat down beside them with the glasses all round,
We drank pints of bitter, it really was sound.
They told me of Tetley’s, and Higson’s and Bass,
But they reckoned that Theakston’s, it is really first class

. . . .and they sang. . . . 

“We got wind in the mornin’, and a whackin’ great head,
And we heaved down the toilet and went back to bed. . . .
For we had chips and fishes, after ten pints of beer
And it dulls all your senses and your belly feels queer. . . .

“. . . We drink in the Nag’s Head, the Grapes and the Bull,
And we sup all our ale, ‘til our bellies are full.
Then we go down the chippy, for a chop suey roll,
And we heave down the gutter and we get the bus home. . . .

. . . .Last time with feelin’. . . .

“We got wind in the mornin’, and a whackin’ great head,
And we heaved down the toilet and went back to bed. . . .
For we had chips and fishes, after ten pints of beer,
And it dulls all your senses and your belly feels queer.”

Tags: humor, rhyme,